Alleee and Franc's
INSOLITOLOGY

Click here to go back to the main page

Submit your own Crackpot Theory


Do you have a theory that explains EVERYTHING ? Do you have an explanation for a previously unexplained phenomena, involving cubes or octogons or Ray knows what ? Send us your crackpot theories and the funniest will be featured on this page.

The "Submit your own Crackpot Theory" game is now closed. Thank you to everyone who sent their theories ! You can still read the old ones below. Those who have not yet been added will be added eventually.


Theories submitted :


Name : The fetus master
In Australia, in Dreamworld on giant drop, if you sneeze while going down and screaming, your brain may well fly out of your nose. As you are falling the wind rushes up your nose and inflates the space in your nose (like a balloon), so then because of the earth's gravity your brain will become weightless from the drop. Now if you sneeze, the power of the sneeze will move and push your brain out the large space in your nostril and fly out. If someone you know is a crackpot then this might have happened to them, exept they might have a bug lodged in their brain from the fall or just when they were walking around.


Name : bob
My theory is that if you teach a lizard to dance the flamingo while singing any KISS song then you will be bestowed great power! But! If you are bestowed these powers then you must NOT, I repeat, MUST NOT BECOME THE GOVENOR OF AFGHANISTAN!!!!!!! I have not tried this theory yet myself because my lizard specimen, George, is always too busy eating waffles to learn the flamingo.........CURSE THOSE WAFFLES!!!!!!


Name : AngeL
Goats:Most unmanmade matter has a purpose.Against all controversy, humans are cloning.To avoid moral issues CLONE goats to be bred at the dumps and landfill sites in the United States.Perhaps these garbage eaters are provided in life to do just that.


Name : Hitlery Klintoon
Islam is a religion of peace.


Name : Jessica
God is the highest being while the lower beings are angels, gods and goddesses. then the saints. then human. then unhappy spirits or beings.


Name : ELK
Religion


Name : Harvey Katz
All of us are one conscious being who intentionally becomes the billions of people one at a time (in quantum time) so with the help of the forgetfulness implanted, the being is temporarily fooled into thinking that it is not all alone. (Yes I know it not completely original - but what is?). If you don't post this, I will when I become you. PS - Don't drink soap ok, ok? Hello? Who's there? All what?


Name : Xenocide
It's quite simple, Jupiter became a gas giant after a titanic war with UFOs. Unfortunately, when they all died, they started transmitting their psychic memories into our brains. This is what causes us to believe in such things as logic, reason, God, and Congress when in fact we are all really comatose and have been since 4000 B.C. when Jupiter was destroyed. Since then we are all truly stuck together in a great psychic dream. Angels are the manifestation within our reality of the 'awakened ones' who are trying to bring the rest of us back to conciousness. We all have a hidden memory of the catastrophe in the Adam and Eve Story.


Name : Adolf Hiroshumi
The United States is really a 3rd world country compared to the rest of the world. The rest of the world is actually way ahead of us. Our superiors just want us to remain and feel that we are the "superpower" when truly the rest of the world could care less about us. We do not influence nothing and when people take vacations, they are actually gassed, passed out, and taken to a remote part of the world that is similar to that of what we actually think. The reason the U.S. and the rest of the world do not want us knowing our current state is becau...


Name : X
Ok, so, Ive discovered that we all come from sea Horses. When X created the universe from his dead skin cells he created Sea Horses. When sea Horses bob up and down it gave us the instinct to eat pizza, and get high. They slowly turned into Water breathing humans with seahorse like attributes. They worked entirely by instinct. One of them crawled on land and adapted to the air it turned into Herfs. It reproduced asexually by budding and created Little herfs, Namely, Humans. Anyways they were evilly inclined 2 demensional objects who evilly think they are 3d. Other little herfs budded, and formed other animals. My mission is to discover the 3d Giant Herf and become one with him to know the truth and experience X. Also all who believe we are 3d will die in the year 3000 and be constantly eaten and regurjitated by X. Herf is in the center of the univer continnually budding more and more stuff that evil scientists are wrong about. Also all movement is !
governed by tinie tiny bottles of coke that use caffine for energy. The atom and the sphere Are evil Beliefs of the bad pple who will be eaten and thrown back out by X(the great Essence). Everyone who lives to 3000 will die cuz its the Herf's Coming into our evil world to see who he likes and doesnt. Jesus was the Great X in Human (little, evil, huminoid, Herf) Form


name : Joe Multz
I am quantum Harvey Katz. I disagree vehemently with my other Harvey Katz. I drink soap all the time. My doctor says I have the cleanest stomach he has even seen using his endoscope. Does the fact that one aspect of the primal Harvey disagrees completely with that Harvey form a quantum mechanical vortex loop, or is Harvey schizo? And if Harvey is schizo, then we are all schizo. And if we are all schizo then we are all different people. Thus we can only come to the conclusion that Harvey is a crackpot. This proves you can drink soap.


name : Boo
Cyp is right, with the possible exception of everything but >the last 12 words!


name : 5 a.m. revelations
Women are single because they are waiting for the right man to come along. When this man presents himself, she will give up the single life. You don't let a good man slip away, right? Men, on the other hand, are single just because they want to be. Even if the perfect woman comes along, she will be nothing more than a friend w/ benefits to him, because he wants to be single. Period. The question is, does he know she's perfect and doesn't care? Or do men not realize it at all? I'm still trying to figure that one out.


name : Bryan Maloney
There is a conspiracy of so-called "mental health professionals". If you look at DSMIV, you will see all disorders are not of the intellectual form, that is they do not talk about disorder of the memory or of forgetting things by itself nor of the difficulty in forming conclusions without being socially maladapted. In Real Health professions they know that sprained ankle is every bit as much a disorder as is the broken leg with the bone protruding, even if sprained ankle is not ugly and socially unappealing.


name : incorrigible deadbeat
loohaber is massive she is the personification of mass and the universe is mass therefore the universe can be summed up as that of loohaber making her supreme overlord of everything and all


name : brian spooner
''Stig of the Dump''{The TV. programme} is an Orlogram of 'Polyester Fruitbat'; divide this by the square root of minus one and you get, 'Kill Jesus'. Just one more example of the hold that Satanists have on theBBC.


name : Brad
I beleive that a giant meteor will hit Earth and break Earth in half. I think many people will die where it hits. Both of them will turn circular, then one will turn to Charon and the other chunk will go around the Charon. Earth will have two moons. Earth will never be the same.Thats what I think.Is that enough? It better be. I'm only eight.


name : Carson Burley
Santa is just a cover so the drug peddiling columbian midgets can get away with selling thier dru ..... i mean "giving presents" to all "the good boys and girls"


name : David F Mayer
I believe that all of the crackpots on the Internet are part of one vast but totally disorganized conspiracy to drive the rest of us nuts.


name : David Laginsky
That all of this is just me dreaming that i'm dreaming that he's dreaming that i'm dreaming that you dreaming that i'm dreaming that i'm dreaming that this is all a dream.


name = Too Crackpot to say or they may take me away
Long ago aliens crashed on our pitiful planet and out of boredom and pity they mated with the ape like beings here giving rise to a semi-hairless ape with the capacity to imagine strange things that do not exist, 100k years later we figured out what had happend and even made a movie about it and the same year the aliens returned and we all discovered that all this time we had never really died but had be colating the experiences of many ape lives and really existed in an undectable aether type substance some physicst theorized on but couldn't prove, to arrive at this point in time- the end, and a new beginning.


name = pritha pathak
heys....umm....im really interested in black holes and time and space mass and such stuff and ive evolved this theory in my head. i went over and over this again and again and it seems totally sensible to me. my parents think im crazy but i dont believe that. i dont care what they think. okay, actually, i was going through some notes of this guy who was explaining some stuff about the 4th dimension and i got this stuff in my head. i checked everywhere but no where could i find what was in my head. my idea is totally original. im just saying that if anyone wants to know about my idea pls contact me @ pathakpritha@hotmail.com
dont think im crazy....plz....im totally sane....not totally maybe....ive been having theories about the universe since forever and stuff but....im abnormal and my stuff seems sensible to me....if anyones interested, contact me. byes. thank 4 listening. byes!
~Love,
~Pritha


name = Howard Edge
God created monkeys which ran around the world with machine guns (which explains the extinction of the dinosaurs). The monkeys then grew tails from the appendix so the could hold two machine guns. They then set about to destroy humanity and adopted the use of rocket launchers. This mass of hyper breeding monkeys then challenged god, who hid behind a cloud and refused to come out until the monkeys had put away thier rocket launchers. God was still upset about all the monkeys killing his pets, the dinosaurs, so he cut off the monkey's tails and told them to eat it. The monkeys got angry and planned to destroy the world one day. They hid inside trees in the woods for Thousands of years. Man and woman had been created, and the monkeys took thier chance to pounce out of the trees in the year 2035. The humans were bewildered, outnumbered and overwhelmed by the monkeys. The monkeys went about slaughtering humans with thier machine guns BUT their fingers were extremel!
y weak from playing checkers in tree trunks for the past
6,000,000,000 years. They found it hard to pull the trigger on the guns. After a couple of years of war, the humans started to retaliate during the Autumn of 2037. They invented Super Mega Power Beam Guns to kill the monkeys, and the monkeys soon died out and were then extinct. And then God came out from his cloud, and everyone saw him once again. Everyone now knew he was real, until a streaker ran infront of him and burned his eye sockets out with the laser beam.
The monkeys explain everything, from atom construction to river water. And the mystery of God has been concluded as well. The only mystery that still remains is the mystery of what God did for 6,000,000,000 years behind a cloud. Oh and Jesus was a monkey too.

Howard Edge


name = JFN
I beleive ( and I know this is REALLY far-fetched, but bear with me and REALLY think about this) that life is just a bunch of random events; has always been, and the human brain has evolved to deal with these events and life and has become too smart for it's own good and has created wack crap like religion, etc., to battle the chaos so we dont go around killing each other more than we already do, and that when you die, you may or may not 'go somewhere' as a spirit, but life is SO freakin simple, it is only us that confuses stuff. So...... go out and get laid, try not to hurt anyone too bad, treat others well, stay away from the real evil crap like Scientology, eat good food, call your family and tell them that you love and appreciate them (the ones that arent assholes) and dont worry so freakin' much!!!. Wow isnt that weeeeeiiiiiiiird??.....


name =
Here it is. You know that disease that makes you gradually forget stuff, Alsimas or whatever, why dont it's sufferers gradually forget they have it? There fore, the do not forget things any more! It works in theory, as it must be a phychological thing stored in the memory, whether the sufferer is aware or not. So, if the disease wipes your memory, it should wipe itself! Tell me what you think.


name = Russell E. Rierson
REALITY = MIND The Universal Mind creates itself - self referentially - retroactively. Retroactive teleological causation can be described by the transactional interpretation of quantum mechanics, where wave distributions of probability originate in the past, present, and future - giving a super Copernicanative juxtapositional - teleological basis FOR our perceptual reality... There is no preferred frame of reference. The perceptual Universe emerges from the fundamenmtal essence that is the unspoken - undefinable - undifferentiated TAO. Events become actualized when waves from the past and the future interfere with each other, converging to the ever- present NOW on the Euclidean plane of a holographic n-1 dimensional hypersurface. This is manifested by the time invariance of energy conservation, such, that time itself is actually a perceptual illusion. The wave patterns[probability distributions] also create what we perceive as spacetime[gravitons], mass, and "energy". Gravity is also virtual. Since the Universe has no exterior reference frame, and it must refer to itself, such, that its overlapping Lorentz invariant geometry is a computational self configuration. The evolution of spacetime, as dictated by GR and QM, means that the past history of the Universe is carried along with the present, FOR the Universe. A densification of the Universal space-like Euclidean hypersurface. The Universe is a function of itself. Space becomes relativistically "contracted", "virtual" time becomes relativistically dilated. As the time evolution proceeds in the thermodynamic direction of "virtual" time, the n-dimensional Euclidean hyper-plane continually increases in information density. The information storage of perceptual space-time. A metric field can be defined by the primary substratum of events. Thus the intrinsic geometrical structure of spacetime is predicated on the pseudo-Riemannian spaces via the affine relationships — all physical events are fully reducible to manifestations of the substratum i. e. the event density generating a metric field. Stochastically speaking, gravity must be taken beyond the limits of classical reality, where the mean value of the stress energy tensor of quantum fields also has fluctuations as a source of stochastic Einsteinian vacuum equations. Such is the necessary foundation for neo-classical gravity and the viability of inflationary cosmology based on the vacuum energy dominated phase. Metric fluctuations and spacetime gravitons form an elementary substrate. Yes, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line; energy is conserved. The uncertainty principle and gravity are related to the same mathematical properties. The proof of the


name = Pistol Pete
I belive that theories are really annoying


name = Meh
In the beginning, GOD saw the void and said: let there be wood, because he, you know, wanted wood. And wood there was, but no trace of those pesky weapons of mass moronization. And then god SAID, I mean, GOD said: let there be Poland, lest I forget it. And Poland there was. And GOD was pleased.


name = Harvey Katz
When I become Joe Multz, I will be a lot kinder to me and will not drink soap, even if it's the new Dr. Bronner's organic formula (see his web page for a hoot!). To Joe - I never said you cannot drink soap. I just advised you not to. Ok? OK? OK? As for being a crackpot, check the name of the page we were published on! By the way everyone, "Joe Multz" is the code name my older brother uses to chide me. In reality, he's a retired plasma physicist with genius mathematical ability and generally a nice guy.


name = Ian Kinman
Mao Tse Tung and Colonel Sanders were the same person. Think about it. Did you ever see them in the same room?


name = Elvis
Since radio and TV began broadcasting, space aliens have been monitoring us. They were particulary impressed by Elvis and when they visit us, they usually dress to look like him. We wouldn't be able to pronounce their names, so let's just call them "Elvii". The Elvii think we're too stupid to run our own affairs, so they constantly meddle but with mixed results.


name = anon
Your site is an attempt to distract people from those crackpots that actually have a good theory by displaying those that are bullshitters very prominently.


name = James R. Jacobsen
Have you ever considered that absolutely nothing actually exists? It existed before time started, along with absolutely everything. The awareness of this basic paradoxical duality, (Absolutely Everything & Absolutely Nothing coexisting simultaneously, together, intricately intertwined), caused the start of real-time.


name = Your Basic Crackpot Theory of Everything
Have you ever considered that Absolutely Nothing actually exists?
It existed before time started, along with absolutely everything. The awareness of this basic paradoxical duality, (Absolutely Everything & Absolutely Nothing coexisting simultaneously, together, intricately intertwined), caused the start of real-time. The Judeao-Christian culture of Western civilization tends to deny the existence of Absolutely Nothing. This causes words, (reference points), that adequately describe the phenomena of absolutely nothing, not to be a part of the common vernacular. Attempts to describe Absolutely Nothing usually include the fact that it doesn't and cannot exist, yet it exists. The failure to recognize that Absolutely Nothing exists, as a viable entity, causes many flawed viewpoints and the inability to truly finalize a T.o.E.


name = Schishploeffenügen
Oxygen… gas of life, or secret military death vapor? You decide. Have you ever stopped to wonder why everyone who’s died has breathed oxygen? Makes you think… Some have argued, what about unborn babies? They receive oxygen through the mother, which then causes their death. And what about those who die from lack of oxygen? I think that oxygen is a sort of extremely addictive, slow-acting poison. When the oxygen supply is cut off, the withdrawal is so severe that it’s fatal.


name = Embrodak
Dinosaurs never really existed. You can argue that it’s common knowledge that dinosaurs roamed the earth at one point long ago, but how do you know? Have you ever seen a dinosaur? Movies and television, credible as they may be, do not count. For all we know, some goofballs went around burying giant artificial bones just to confuse us all.


name = Emtarkanderundersgunderson
The earth used to be flat. Now, you may argue that it’s common knowledge that the world is round, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t flat at one time… Everyone knows that man, for the longest time, thought the world was flat. And we all know that man is, over all, quite intelligent. So it would make sense that he thought the earth was flat because it was indeed flat. Besides, have any of you been around since the beginning of time? So, how do you know the earth was always round? Point proven: you don’t. Now, if my argument is correct, then what caused the earth to become round? Money, of course. We all know ‘money makes the world go round.’ Therefore, the earth became round when currency was invented.


name = Fenrus T Opplestoncher
I have discovered the underlying TRUTH of the internet; that if I make a WEBSITE and write nonsensical sentances randomly capitalising words as I go ( especially TRUE, God likes the word TRUE to be underlined! ) then people will come to understand the TRUE HIDDEN REALITY and live forever in peace, love and understanding of TRUTH. Obviously the TRUE HIDDEN REALITY of the world is revealed to us mostly through magnetism but having chewed my way through a wikipedia article on super string theory I feel I'm in a position to say that it corroberates my claims about the TRUE MEANING of REALITY.

P.S - Those who don't teach time cube are evil!


name = wrdlbrmpfd
Every 7000 years, a COMET strikes earth! The Catholic Church has been faking history for a long time to cover this up and enslave us all! They have been copying things from history before the last comet (4000 BC) and tell us that these things happened much later. So the real history is that there were two nations, Lemuria (Alderney) and Mu (Isle of Man) fighting in the British Isles. Mu/Carthago won. But Alderney, which was left to the Lemurians, was destroyed by a great flood (the Permian extinction) and they had to move to Atlantis/Troy (Jersey). This was inwaded by the Greeks (French) and they had to flee to Rome (London). The Twelve Tribes emigrated from Mesopotamia (Germany) soon after that and settled in Hattusha (Stonehenge). Two tribes soon emigrated to Egypt (Tunisia), but they were enslaved there, so they fled to Israel (Southern France). The ten remaining tribes were called the Hittites or Etruscans. Eventually, they, Mu, and everyone else in Britain were conquered by the Romans in London, who soon had a great empire ruling most of Western Europe. This was later divided into the Roman and Byzantine Empires. The capital of the latter one was Calais. Then a comet destroyed Earth's civilization. I'm not yet sure what happened after that.


name = I'm not tellin'
Well, the Grateful Dead are (were) actually a cover for the Zeta Grey aliens. This is actually true, and I don't feel like talking about it.


name = Lobulus Snit
Two hundred thousand years ago, a large Lobulus landed in Borneo and created jungle. All jungles can be traced to this event, according to the Book of Lobulus, which is a true rendering of the facts of the universe. Except for the part about the ingrown tonails, but that's another theory.


name = Joe Schlobotnik
I believe that we were all bred by aliens from monkeys. We are less hairy than monkeys and more intelligent. Although, evolutionary speaking, we don't have grey skin with almond shaped eyes, I've seen some Russians with these types of characteristics. Now, do we have the same sex organs as aliens/monkeys? I propose not, that aliens are advanced is a fact. So, they don't need big units like I have. Instead, their little pee-pees are just enough to sperminate the monkeys in deep dark forests. I hope there is a hot chick who reads this and agrees with me and wants to get a Mountain Dew later on. I'm really horny.


name = Out Of Mind in the house
Since time is infinite, everything will happen an infinite number of times. We will eventually be every person, animal, thing, or a part of each, on every planet or object in the universe or all possible universes and/or dimensions. Given infinite time, the reformation of energy (which is neither created nor destroyed) and atoms, has no limit. For example: Your next conscious life may be a flea on the ear of a doglike creature in another galaxy. It may take awhile before that happens however.


name = Ariel Frederic
Most people are very kind and loving. Most people are not selfish. Most people are very giving and concerned with the wellfare of others. We all should have great faith in humankind; for we all love one another and help each other. There is not one person who is selfish and "in it" for him or herself.


name = Casey andrew de jong
Casey de Jong’s theory of everything

Everything that exists does so because of two entities SPACE and TIME the only constants being infinite.
Space: A static entity which is infinitely large and ever extending.
Time: A dynamic entity which is infinite and ever moving.

It is my theory that the physical reaction of time constantly moving through space created energy and that energy became the first object in the universe the singularity which scientists have been trying to find. This first object was an active sub atomic particle comprised of fragments of space and time caught in a constantly regenerating loop stabilizing the sub atomic particle and giving it form. This object of pure energy was the only piece of matter which existed thus was the most dense and with the highest gravity. Being comprised of time and space it had the ability to attract time and space towards it causing more friction within itself until it exploded into a colossal amalgamation of time and space or the “space time dimension”* out side of this dimension it forced space and time away from each other thus space became a dimension and time became a dimension.
So now we have three dimensions:
1.SPACE
2.TIME
3.SPACE TIME

The three dimensions I believe need each other to exist and therefore there are still connections between TIME and SPACE/TIME and SPACE and SPACE/TIME.
The three I think must work together similar to a battery with time being the positive terminal and space being the negative terminal connected by the circuit space/time. This is why time cannot be reversed because doing so would reverse space and in doing so possibly undo our space/time dimension.

The dimension of time feeds space/time energy created by friction between Time and the Space within space/time. The energy created is not anywhere as powerful as the initial particle of pure energy because one of the ingredients is tainted and impure but the amount of energy is enough to sustain the universes growth and stop it from collapsing in upon itself.

Space itself is a vacuum and the dimension of space has a greater vacuum than that of the space/time dimension therefore matter is pulled out of the space/time dimension by the dimension of space with a great force.

The amount of energy injected into our dimension of space/time by the dimension of time I expect is proportional to the amount extracted by the dimension of space.



How is this possible and what proof is there?

Quasars until now have been seen as stars with strange properties. They give of strange light and because of that they have been assumed to be traveling away at tremendous speeds or collapsing. But they also give of radio signals something very irregular for a star to do.
It may be that the signals picked up by radio horns when pointed at a quasar are the result of static. The static which could be created by friction by time and time/space traveling past each other. And the strange light signals could be because of the energy being created having a higher concentration of time than elsewhere in the universe meaning that they are the points where the dimension of time is feeding into the dimension of space/time.

Black Holes are points perceived to be the result of a collapsed star having an immense gravity so much so that it can turn entire galaxies into what would appear to be nothing.
If quasars are the points where the dimension of time injects energy into the dimension of space/time then logically the points at which the dimension of space can extract matter from space/time would have the opposite qualities to a quasar the most likely of universal bodies are black holes.


I suggest that the first singularity was pure energy created by friction caused by time moving through space

I suggest that all things that exist are an energy created by friction based in different density combinations of time and space

I suggest that god was created when our dimension was created that he learned how to manipulate the fabric of space/time to create the universe

I suggest that three dimensions exist one of pure time one of pure space and one comprised of space and time

I suggest that quasars and black holes are holes in the very fabric of space/time connecting to the dimensions of Space and Time to the dimension of space/time which we exist in.

I suggest that the dimension of space/time act as a circuit between the dimensions of time and space

*Also at this time, the creation of the SPACE TIME DIMENSION I being a believer in a creator feel that GOD if he had a beginning must have been born into existence because if god is pure energy comprised of space and time it would explain him having ultimate control over all things seen and unseen and his being able to create the universe out of what would appear to be nothing except space and time. Not wanting to sound blasphemes I make it known that god may have been all along it was only a suggestion to those who need the answer to the question if god created us who created god.

This document was written after viewing the six part documentary Steven Hawkins Universe and no further study into the laws of quantum physics besides the knowledge of the idea behind them so if I have quoted any one or plagiarized any one’s work I am sorry but I didn’t mean to I am sure these ideas are not new but I thought I would publish them anyway just in case it inspired someone. After all it is only a theory because I cant prove it but if someone can then great and if they can disprove it then that is another thing that we can rule out.


All matter is made of time particles and space particles organic matter has more time particles and thus is affected by time in a way which can be seen in movement and decomposition. Non organic matter such as the elements are also affected by time as we can see by the science of carbon dating but being less dense in time particles the decomposition of the elements are much slower. Rust between two different metals ocours quickly due to the ability of time being able to pass quickly through the open space between the two metals

The question is not what is the speed of light and the answer is not in the equation e=MC2 but it is what is the speed of time and the answer is in the process of slowing it down like in frezzing or sealing in elements/ mumification for example T=ES3 time = energy x the area of space cubed!!

hope this gets to someone wo can understand it
thankyou for letting me voice my opinion

Casey Andrew deJong
d.o.b 5/7/80
Modbury Hospital
Adelaide south Australia
PH. 82502911
Azraeldemarco@hotmail.com


name = catfish sturgeon
Okay, see: Ian Kinman is not just a legendary New West mouthopiece, but a close (inner space)
confidant of Quinn the Eskimo and Bob Dylan. But Kinman also hangs with Cosmoses (the original Moses who went stellar after being booted out of the Promised Land. So, following the world's first successful "mind-meld" (not Vulcanized), Dylan, Kinman, and Cosmoses bumped into each other at Quinn's Galactic Eskimo Pie Shoppe located deep in the frozen tundra of the 12th planet.
This exp[lains EVERYTHING as far as i'm concerned.
Of course, new data is emerging moment-to-moment.


name = Heinrich Schlonkenheim
OK, hang on to your hats, because this is the real deal. I know I should be submitting this to the relevant scientific journals, but right now I am willing to share this with all of you instead. Its about hypodermic quantum equations, also commonly referred to as the Feigenblatt methods. I have definite mathematic and observational proof that these are wrong. Yes, its incredible, I know. I fully realize what I am saying here and what the consequences of this on modern Physics and Biology will be. Just two of the devastating consequences of this are : 1) Yetis CAN breed in space naturally (not as Feigenblatt assumed "only when supplied with large space suits.").
2) Lunar rover related incidents do NOT have to be covered by liability insurance. In most cases they will be setted out of court.
These are just some of the thunderous consequences. Thanks, Heinrich Schlonkenheim, Munich


name = Shalashaska
I have heard an interesting theory which states that if you jump and then jump again at the apex of that jump, then flight occurs.


name = Kyle White
What anything believes can only be broken down to infinite.1, when your mind truly understands that it does not exist, it never would have existed, it would be infact, nothing. Pure Nothing.


name = Soggy SW
Well i believe that theres a dead indian women living in all our roofs. That explains globalisation.


name = I Like The Stalin In You
I believe that if you are to practice a religion you should at least believe that one god loves you out there, but the Christian God as we know him is not a friendly god. He is out to laugh and he does it through our pain, like reality television and Oprah. God hates me and he hates all of the rest of you too (but he hates me more). Darn you God and your uncontrolable addiction to laughing.


name = [shitsumeishi]
Billions of years ago the Martians became too advanced too quickly. They had no fathomable way to control the growing pollution caused by the recent boom in technological advances. They could only calculate how long they had until the planet would be swallowed up by exterminating gases and chemicals. They only had a couple hundred of years to finish their attempt to save their dominant species. They had watched Earth through out it's development. They knew it would eventually be able to support life, because it was so like their Mars during its toddler years. They eventually built enough spacecraft for the population. Fighter ships with Martian warriors went ahead before the civilian crafts to inspect the planet. The Martian warriors found the dinosaurs of course. Dinosaurs would get in the way of the plan to start over, so they extincted-ed them! Unfortunately, the Martians did not expect the climate to be so cruel to their technology. It all basically turned to dust. Many died throughout the years from sickness due to proper food and lack of medicine. They were forced to live primitively, and thus became cavemen. And the rest you 'know' already, so meh... :D


name = [shitsumeishi]
I believe there is no such thing as normal. Therefore if noone/thing was normal, everyone/thing would be weird, yes? But, If everyone/thing was weird, it would be considered normal, which doesn't exist. With that said, We don't exist. But not existing is a form of existence, therefore we exist as well.

Same principle applies to everything. There is no such thing as a perfect line or the exact color blue; it doesn't exist, and yet exists because of its non-existence.

Aren't paradoxes simply wonderful?


name = can't remember it
Gene Ray may be a brilliant thinker, but he is slightly wrong. As you correctly said on the Time Cube page, a cube has eight corners and not four. You can view a cube as one square on the top and one at the bottom, connected by 4 lines. Now the top square is day and the bottom is night, and the 4 lines are sunup/sundown. A cube also has six sides which are the six days of the week (God rested on the 7th day so it doesn't count). So there are not only 4 simultaneous days but also 4 simultaneous weeks. Add another week and we have 30 days which is close enough to the old calendar, and we don't have to buy a new calendar every year because the weekdays are always the same. In fact the Gregorian Calendar is the result of a conspiracy to terraform our planet into something the aliens can inhabit by destroying all the forests and turning them into calendars. This also proves that Pi is exactly 3 and that after our death we will spend eternity in a universe filled with pudding.


name = Chuck
The Earth is getting lighter from all the coal we mine from it, and since we're getting lighter, we're floating closer to the sun!


name = Gomer-Tonic
George Lucas is a genius, and the prequels fit PERFECTLY with the original Star Wars films. If you don't understand it, you're a $^%^ing idiot and just don't get it! Long live Jar Jar Binks!


name = TYTROAD
I believe the inhabitants of Easter island did not build the giant stone heads for any relationship to "the gods", nor was thier relationship with birds a good one. In fact, they were exposed to one of the earliest forms of a bird flu pandemic. Their lack of medicine forced them to think of other ways to prevent the killer flu. One way of doing this was to build giant "scarecrows" looking to the skies. As time went on, the flu was showing no signs of stopping and all the work spent on the stone heads (scarecrows)was futile and therefore drove them to destroy the heads in anger as thier civilization whittled away.


name = Norm Bishop
Jesus was actually a guy who one day decided to build a wooden sphere, and fill it with black flamingoes. The flamingoes one day got angry and burnt the sphere to the ground and decided to attack the country of sweeden. the king of sweeden at that time countered the attacking birds with catapults that hurled flaming trash bags. but the birds were too powerfull and forced the people of sweeden out, so they then moved to north america and started a country called america. then eventully a guy named steve started a soya bean farm and created soya milk and tofu, so that all the hippies in the world could think there cool eating weird stuff. the hippies then did too much heroin one day and drove there vw beetles into the ocean. all the cars in the ocean polluted it, and that is what caused global warming.


name = Andrew Wood
Football is a mind Controlling Mechanism. They are using it to put the urge to kill into our minds, so that eventually, the parts of England (which is Known as Inguamann in My religion of the truth, Spongism) will dive on, and kill each other.
I also have a theory that that Parapsycologists are there to cover up every paranormal event in the world, ghosts, banshees, Zombies, The Loch Ness Monster, all real and all caged in large holding facilities in The Gobi Dessert.