Alleee and Franc's
INSOLITOLOGY

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Alex Chiu, immortal
born : 1971 (San Francisco, US), and does not expect to die
Quote : "By wearing the Eternal Life Device, you should immediately experience a very powerful energy flowing in your body. What is the reason? What I believe is that the small finger or the toes are the transistor of the entire body. Your body acts like a transistor"

Alex Chiu pictureAlex Chiu is certainly the oddball who has the most original, varied, and coherent ideas of our Oddball Top 5, and that makes him a crowd favourite. Not only that, but he believes that he has found nothing less than a way to live forever. How ? Just buy, or make yourself, his Eternal Life rings and foot braces.

His Eternal Life Devices (ELDs) are said to work on the principle of magnetism, aligning molecules in the body in line with their poles, thus healing not only wounds, but old age, and other sorts of illness which do not depend directly on molecular alignment ! They are truly miracles of science.

Religion is also involved. Alex invokes the Torah as proof that God plans to make heaven and eternal life available here on Earth, and that he has found the key. Furthermore, Eternal Life will make us all a perfect race. Alex does not only talk about Eternal Life, but also about evolution, matter and gravity, teleportation, God and the Bible, the elimination of all ills, global peace, divination, and more. The scope of his work is so large that one feels almost petty criticizing him : we want to pat him on his back for being able to come up with so much entertaining material in such an earnest and naive fashion.

When you click on the site, do not be deceived. You are not entering a simple product-selling web site : you are entering Alex Chiu's mind. Prepare to enter the wonders of Eternality.


emblem of Alex Chiu
Alex Chiu's Eternal Life Device

The most common oddball fallacy is to associate oneself with spurned figures of science, and Alex is no exception to that rule. Recently he has changed his front page in an attempt to associate himself with Edison (electric lamp, phonograph, motion picture), Tesla (AC, remote control, radio, wireless energy), and Einstein (Relativity, E=mc2, modern physics). Alex's claim to fame is, of course, the invention of his ELDs.

ELD ring in each hand The ELD pages are perhaps the least entertaining part of the site, although they are interesting in getting a feel for the particular "Alex Chiu style" - a quaint broken english, coarse graphics made with Microsoft Paint (not that I'm one to talk, admittedly...), and bold pseudo-scientific proclamations. Basically, all they are is magnets encased in plastic, that you can slip on your finger or feet. His "evidence" that it works are composed of a truckload of testimonials (some even recorded in Real Audio), and the bad science highlighted in the quote above. Alex also offers free rings if you participate in his referral program, which has led to a rash (now receding) of Alex Chiu banners on the Internet last year. He also thoughtfully includes how to build your own ELDs.

Alex's weird scientific ideas on the nature of germs and viruses also make him think that the rings can cure bacteria. But that is not the end of his claims, since he has recently begun to claim that he can cure handicaps, AIDS, and even death itself, with magnetic coils. Alex asks : "If a median can draw a dead person's soul into her body, why can't we draw a dead person's soul into a clone?". That's a big "if", Also, ginseng helps the healing process because it polarizes your cells. Don't ask. (maybe we should try putting Alex together in a room with "magnetic fields from power lines cause cancer" people and let them fight it out)

teleportation coils Our whirlwind tour continues with teleportation. Alex obviously thinks teleportation is of a vital importance :
Teleportation must be invented. If we don't invent teleportation, China will throw nuclear bomb everywhere. Especially now everyone can live forever.
He ties this in with overpopulation and the liberation of mankind, and his enthusiasm is not unlike that of a Power Rangers cheerleader. As for how teleportation is supposed to work, well, somehow Alex thinks that if we know the frequency of an object, we can reconstitute it in its entirety. I think the source of Alex's problems is that he only listened to exactly half of all his physics classes.

As you may have figured out by now, Alex's kookmotiv is magnetism and frequency, two concepts that he intimately associates in all his explanations of the world, despite being completely unrelated. His ELDs are based on the idea that "every cell in our body is a magnet. Cells have north and south poles". Likewise, here is how he explains the transmission mechanism of his teleportation idea (see image to the left) :

Both pushing and receiving detects are simple electromagnetic coils. The main job for these two is to detect the frequency of the metal ball. I think that if we can detect the frequency of the metal ball, we can later amplify the frequency of the metal ball and teleport the metal ball away by sending the amplified frequency away

Alex's fixation on magnetism and frequencies becomes full-blown on his "Alex Chiu's New Darwinism" (neo-neo-Darwinism ?). Apparently not accepting either evolution or creationism, Alex rather believes that complex organisms came to exist by straightforward accumulation of particles. It would be rather lengthy to describe : suffice it to say that it must be read to be believed.

Particularily, the "How animals think" section explains to us that we think something because each object has a frequency (of course), and this frequency makes the brain react. His example also teaches us that the best way to get a ball from the drain-hole of your, inevitably wet, sink is a roll of paper.

male and female cell groups formation Also, male and female genders exist in groups of cells because the inner part breaks off from the outer part (see image at right). It is not clear how this applies to humans : does Alex think that women come from the ripped-up internals of a man, in a twisted version of Adam and Eve ? The workings of Alex's mind are inscrutable indeed, but they *are* fairly Freudian.

"What is God ?", asks Alex on his main page. His answer is that God is the workings of natural law. Fair enough : pantheism is very spiritual and nice, and I don't diss it. However, Alex seems to be under the delusion that I-Ching is "the way" to tap into God and figure out the future. As an example of his abilities as prophet of the new millenium, he gives us the following predictions :

"There shall be a great war coming! Very soon! The war is likely to occur in 2004. Seems like there is great danger for the mainland of the United States in the year 2005. The trigger seems like Taiwan. This war will be the bloodiest war of all! China will combine with its neighbors to combat with the Western forces which include USA. Bones will pile up so high like hills. Later the entire world shall be united. Then the God followers will live happily ever after on earth".

Holey moley, everyone run for the hills.

There is a lot more to be said about Alex's ideas about creating a one-world government by selling the entire world into one corporation, or his creative interpretation of the Bible and the Bible Codes, or his philosophical ideas... his web site has numerous wonders to be discovered. But what about Alex himself, what is his goal ? What kind of impact does he want his discoveries to have on society ? Alex's personal background page gives us the answer :
Alicia Silverstone is so beautiful. She is the example of a perfect human blend. I shall endeavor to make everyone as beautiful as Alicia with my inventions.
You have your work cut out for you Alex.


Super I-Ching Ying/Yang symbol
Super I-Ching

Alex also maintains a page specifically for his discovery of his prophecy powers thru the power of I-Ching. Funny, to me throwing sticks on the ground has diddly-squat to do with the future - but who am I to argue with the immortal Alex Chiu ? He has the whole of eternity to kick my ass. Also the annoying MIDIs on his site.

The tactics on his front page likewise seem to take this violent atttitude, and assumes that testimonies of unlucky people who didn't listen to their I-Ching advisor will motivate us into learning. Alex himself had his car whacked by a fire truck on the way to buying a t-shirt because he didn't listen to his I-Ching. Hey Alex, if you want to buy a t-shirt, go on the Internet. You don't need to risk it with all those roaming fire trucks around, I-Ching or no I-Ching.

At any rate, his web site is composed of numerous sections on aspects of learning I-Ching. But unless you are interested in the Chinese calendars or actually leaning I-Ching, many sections will not be interesting. Some sections, however, show Alex's take to his material. In "I-Ching is related to God?", he desperately attempts to twist Bible verses to show that it really, truly doesn't disapprove of I-Ching. He is really intolerent towards people who don't practice I-Ching, as this quote from "More about God" demonstrates :
"Let's say you are a person who keeps saying, "I believe in the Lord. I fear the Lord.". But you never study or practice I-Ching. God will kill you one day because you are insincere. You are only pretending to be faithful to the Lord, but in your heart you have no place for the Lord. Therefore, Lord will not be on your side".
Also watch out for the "Alex Chiu's Secret Techniques" section, where he advises of the proper use of a crystal ball.


Alex Chiu Tribute Site

"Rickb" really liked Alex Chiu. Who could blame him ? So he made a random Chiu quoter and follows all the new stuff about him. He even has a picture with Alex. Now that's dedication.



The Wacko Interviews, #1
Pudge's Pad : Random Alex Chiu Quote

Alex Chiu was interviewed by the humour magazine Fade to Black. Alex is at times self-affirming ("I'm different! I'm special! I have a real life!"), and at times optimistic ("Says on the Iching sign Teleportation will become a reality in the year 2007"). Pudge's Pad also has random quotes of Alex that you can consult again and again for all your needed magnetic wisdom.


Weekly World News article

Apparently, Alex Chiu was also in that paragon of informational journalism, Weekly World News. Lots of happy testimonies on how Alex's rings have saved the lives and health of the masses. I like how the "journalist" called him "a modern-day Ponce de Leon -- the famed Spanish explorer who searched for the Fountain of Youth ".



Alex Chiu RPG

This is absolutely hilarious, if you played Final Fantasy games when you were younger, or if you're drunk, or both.



NEWS

Alex Chiu will appear on our show, the Hellbound Alleee Show, on July 1st. We are quite excited to have this opportunity to talk with the master of eternal life himself.




review written by Franc, 07/2002, last updated 06/2005.